I am often late to the party. I mean, I didn’t see that dancing baby video until 2006.
Anyway, I just learned this morning that there is a group of men who are super pissed off about there being “women only” showings of Wonder Woman.
Are…are you fucking kidding me?
For reals?
There is a loud group of men losing their shit over this. Women can’t complain about being excluded and then exclude men! What about our rights? Also, we have no idea how to make a valid argument!
I think I need to womansplain this situation.
When I was a little girl in Catholic school, smart kids got to go to Latin school. Well, smart kids who were boys.
Didn’t matter how smart you were if you were a girl, girls were excluded. 100% excluded.
Not that I would have gone even if there wasn’t a “no girls allowed” rule. I spent most of my school years lost in day dreams and not getting good grades.
Women had to fight to be allowed to vote. To get credit cards. To serve on juries. We could be fired from our jobs for being pregnant. We couldn’t run in the Boston marathon until 1972. Hell, we couldn’t even box in the Olympics until 5 years ago.
No one is saying men are excluded from seeing the Wonder Woman movie. Nope.
That is not the case.
There are just some showings that are women only. See the difference? Being 100 % barred from participating in something beneficial due to not having a penis is not the same as being excluded from a showing of movie that you can see in a different goddamn showing.
Well then, you may ask, why are you so special that you need your own showing? Why shouldn’t men get their own showing as well? No fair!
Let me help you understand.
Not all men have assaulted or abused women. Of course not. But enough have. More than a few. Way fucking more than a few. I have written about this before, but it bears repeating, I do not know a single adult woman who hasn’t been molested, abused, or harassed at least once by a man. Not a single woman. There are degrees, of course. Not every women I know has been raped or beaten. But every woman I know has been treated disrespectfully or have been in situations where they didn’t feel safe due to the actions of a man or men.
And here’s the thing! Some men, who commit heinous violent acts against women appear to be sweethearts! They can appear to be the most upstanding, good-hearted and gentle soul walking the earth while being a monster. I have had first hand experience with this. Women can’t avoid the bad guys by appearances because the bad guys aren’t wearing black hats.
So, what is the only reasonable option here?
We must be diligent and assume that we are in danger when we are around strange men. We must be on guard when we are alone, at home, or in public. It doesn’t make sense to live life otherwise, not when most of us, whether keeping guard or not, have been molested in some way.
Being vigilant is exhausting.
Is it really too much to ask to have a couple hours to sit in a darkened theater and watch a bad ass amazon open up some cans of whoop ass with just other women? Do you know how upset some men get over women super heroes? For all that is fucking holy, they lost their shit over female Ghostbusters. Is it hard to understand why we might want to just watch Wonder Woman do her thing without having to hear comments from men who are obviously intimidated by strong women?
To the men who are butt hurt over this:
Just shut the fuck up about the women only Wonder Woman showings. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. No one is taking anything from you. No one is saying you can’t see the movie. We just don’t want you at a few showings. Go be helpful. Call your brothers out when you see them mistreating women. Stop raping women. Stop beating women. Do these things and maybe women won’t need a couple hours every once in a while to get away from your dumb asses. You are exhausting.
Stand up. Speak up. Love it!
Thank you, my friend!
Amen, sistah.
Thank you!!
Two thumbs up!
Thank yoU!!!
I would gladly help facilitate some women – only showings of this (or actually any) movie. Why the hell not? What on earth would be the downside?
There isn’t a downside! You are so right! I think most of the noise are coming from the “men’s rights” groups…and they hate women so very much. So any reason to stomp and scream and yell….
Michelle,
I have had ALL of those things happen to me. Women can be capable of abuse as well, but that’s for another time. I still wonder why men, who are raised by women, are capable of this. How are sons raised or what are they exposed to that says it’s okay to hurt women they’re supposed to love? it took me way too long to understand that the only person who could change my vulnerability was me. The result did not make me hardened, or a man hater, or a self satisfied ex-victim. It just made me refuse to take crap from anyone about anything anymore and be able to love my life the way anyone should have the chance to do. I don’t wish my former experiences on anyone, but I wouldn’t trade the woman I’ve become because of them.
Thank you for the commentary to remind me to remember that.
Thank you so much for this!
I can relate to each and every thing said here! It’s actually sad that I can, I think, in the sense of who does these things to another human being? I definitely enjoy the company of men (some) and I am not a man-hater but I have had all of these things happen to me – not just once but more than once, and I am not putting up with shit again, that’s all there is to it!! I try to set boundaries calmly but I don’t care if I’m married to you or working for you and I need the job. Men come and go in my experience so I can put a full-stop to that anytime if I get treated badly. As far as needing the job, yes, true, but God will provide. He always has and I am not taking your shit or anyone else’s ever again. No way. Absolutely not. This was an excellent boost to my resolve!! Thank you all so much!!
Yes!!!!
Fucking. A. Right!!! From my experiences throughout life, men can be the biggest whiners. I’ve been dealing with that “being on guard” all the time lately, what with the creepy guy renting the apartment my neighbors have on the back of their home. After discovering him watching me over a high, wooded “privacy” fence one morning and then, on another occasion, staring at me through my hedges, I finally told the home owner and let her know I’d hold her responsible if anything happened to me, my animals or my property. My cat, Pumpkin, is still missing, after having disappeared on April 4th. My gut tells me the creepy rental asshole has something to do with it, but I have no proof. Not yet. I’m no Wonder Woman (I hadn’t even planned to see the movie) but I’m pretty tired of dealing with men. Exhausting is definitely the word.
No way… Hey Gorgeous! Miss you like crazy-cakes!
I’m sorry Pumpkin is missing 🙁
Just saw your name above mine and didn’t even read what you wrote, just hit ‘reply’ so I could hug you real fast.
Peeping Toms are the worst… ‘specially Creepy Peepers… stay safe, Sweets. Here’s hoping he’s as exhausted as you and doesn’t have much more energy than ‘peep.’
Hey, there, Lisa!!! *huge hug!!!!!!* I’ve been dealing with one thing after another lately. It takes all my energy and then some. I want to sneak over to that property at some point to check and see if there are any places in the yard that appear to have been freshly dug up and covered over again. But, I haven’t yet been able to establish a pattern of him being away from the apartment for an extend length of time to do that. The woman who owns the house complained that my hedges were growing over too much on her side of the fence and I need to “do something about it”, so I told my lawn man. Next time he’s here, he’ll be trimming the hedges and I think I’ll go over with him to her side so I can look around while he trims. HAHA! Good or bad news, I’m determined to find out what happened to my little girl. Paul and I took, care of her for 14 years with no problems. This guy moves in and she’s suddenly gone. I hope you’re doing great and enjoying good weather! It’s hot as hell here already—Miami hit a record yesterday at 96 degrees. OMG, I can’t wait for July! :-O XOXO
That’s a good plan 🙁
I’m sorry you have to think it through like that…
Michelle’s right… lots of red flags, so be careful.
Irrigon hit 96 yesterday, too… Gonna be a killer come July and August 🙁
*hugs and more hugs*
I LOVE it when we get few minutes on Mondays <3
Thanks Michelle!
Oh man…so so sorry about your kitty! I would be heartbroken. And fuck that guy, that sends up so many red flags. Please be careful. And it wouldn’t hurt to file a complaint.
Those theaters need to post this at the door 😉
So… are you going to see it?
I am going to see it! I LOVE movies where women kick ass. They make me happy.
I LOVE things that make you happy!!
Let us know how Bad Ass it is!
*dusts off Wonder Woman suit*
What the fuck is wrong with us guys? I’m being inclusive because we all bear responsibility.
Thank you for taking the time to womansplain this. Too many of us, even those who are genuinely good–or at least those of us who hope to be–still sometimes can’t see past our bubble of privilege without help.
I know that there are millions of good men. I am married to one. I raised two. But that’s the thing, you just don’t know by appearances. And it’s super frustrating to be excluded from so many things based on gender and then listen to the most privileged group of people on the planet fucking melt down over it. Could we get just a teeny tiny little break, here? Thank you for being a white hat!
My husband told me that if I found a women’s only screening, he’d understand if I wanted to go…
I think he thinks he was being supportive, but I felt weird (?) that he thought I felt I’d need his permission or blessing…
There are none near me, so we’ll probably see it at a midweek matinee, together. Still, I would LOVE to be in a theater PACKED with only estrogen!
Did you mention that? That you don’t need his blessing? Because I would paint that on a picture and hang it in every room. haha
I think you womansplained it clearly enough so men can understand!
Haha..I couldn’t resist.
Preach it sister!
🙂
I have a quote by Margaret Atwood taped on the back of my phone:
“Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.”
It’s crazy how many people either don’t understand why that resonates or argue that it is untrue. We still have a lot of work to do.
So very much work and that quote is so accurate.
From a strict, public accommodations standpoint, it might not matter that there are alternative showings for men.
But I hope it doesn’t come to that sort of legal analysis, because this is a ridiculous thing to complain about – about a movie showing! – and indicates that some people like whining too much.
It’s clearly a marketing thing to highlight the fact that there aren’t many female superheroes.
Argh!
Yes..we humans do love to whine.
Thank you!
A lot of us women-type humans learn the lesson early on — men are dangerously selfish-protect yourself-DON’T trust. We REALLY learn that lesson hard. While there are a ton of good men in the world (my father! My dear, departed, amazing husband!) letting our guard down so’s we can clearly see them is a triple plus challenge.
Fuck these asswipian baby men, who are so fucking stupid, insecure and oblivious, with a rusty spork!
HAHHAHA..a rusty spork. I love it!
Some bastards are just bastards. Bastard coated bastards with bastard filling, I believe the saying goes.
There seems to be this really difficult idea, that life is not a zero-sum game, that someone else having something doesn’t take anything away from you unless they directly stole it from you. And that brings us around to the crux of the biscuit, as the dearly departed Frank Zappa would have called it: Some people, mostly men, want to own EVERYTHING, and sort of believe they already do, and that doing so is not only OK, but the most natural thing in the world.
I have another idea for them to chew on, though: Things that make the society better enrich us all, because we all FUCKING LIVE IN THE SOCIETY.
And I wonder what those whiny-ass baby-men think of private country clubs that you have to be rich to get into? Should poor people be allowed to use them whenever they want? Or is some measure of privacy and autonomy a good thing to have?
Or are they only a good thing to have when they are convenient for the specific power hungry males we were discussing to begin with?
I think that maybe when you see women as property, women’s autonomy just looks like a property crime to you.
Grow up, motherfuckers, you all had mothers, now act like it.
End of rant.
It’s good to hear from you Michelle, and I hope you are feeling OK.
Ahhhhhh…I love this so much. YAY!
Thank you for asking. I am fine. Still kinda sorta getting over a cold or sinus infection or something, so sluggish..but good.
You are too cool, lady. I chuckled reading this. We speak the same language. Very refreshing.
Thank you so much! So glad you are here!
Well said. That’s it.
Thank you!
Is this really a thing? This is really something people are pissed off about?
I am not going to state this is yet another example of the self-entitled and their faux butt hurtedness over things that people who aren’t them actually have to deal with EVERY FUCKING DAY due to simple facts of nature. I’m also not going to point out that they’re a bunch of whiny little shit heads who are the loudest most obnoxious assholes when people are hurt and upset over real discrimination that they go through daily just by breathing.
Nope. Not going to do it.
I KNOW!!! It is so frustrating.
Most men, not all , are whining weeners, what’s not to laugh about that? Not funny it’s so dangerous to have a bit of joy!!
I am so pleased to not be surrounded by whining weeners. That would make a good name for a cover band, wouldn’t it?
Let’s be honest here – they never wanted to see the fucking movie until they were told they couldn’t come with the women anyway. If you’d said to them “hey, there’s a movie about a chick who kicks a lot of male ass,” they would have said, “no fucking way,” and that would have been the end of it. But now it’s like when my four-year-old has that toy my twelve-year-old hasn’t played with for eight fucking years. Dammit.
(Love you sweetie. Hope you’re well.)
OMG you are so right. That is exactly the mentality. And I am fine. We’re good. Thank you, sweetness. xoxoxox
I wasn’t gonna see the movie until you posted this. And now I want to go just to piss off a few more ‘boys’.
I am right there with you.
Meh…there are way more important things to be pissed about. Like the fact that I have to go to work tomorrow…
Goddammit so much. I am pissed about that too.
Yep, exactly this. Now I need to see it too!
I haven’t seen it yet..but I will.
HELLZYEAH! 😀
🙂
Preach!!!!!
🙂
Yay for you, Michelle!! How many times can I like this? I want to click that Like button 10,000 times! This is so glaringly true and on point. Men just do not get it that women are a-l-w-a-y-s in some sort of danger….from men! We need to be able to feel safe, at least on some rare occasions. And you said it so well. If they don’t get it, then I’m just sad and sorry that they are so stupid.
Exactly!!!
Wow. You nailed it! I thoroughly enjoyed this post and love every word you wrote. Like, get over your fucking selves men!! Ahhhhh!!
Thank you!!!
“I do not know a single adult woman who hasn’t been molested, abused, or harassed at least once by a man.”
Paradigm shift! I’ve never thought of it that way. Personally, I have had to cope with three different stalkers of differing levels of creepiness. Only one made me feel genuinely frightened, but all invaded my boundaries or acted inappropriately. Inappropriately not in the way only my very prim grandmother would see appropriateness, but inappropriate in that other men in my workplace were disgusted.
Personally, I don’t care if there are men in the showing I go to, but GEEZ! Men, give us some girl-time if we want it!
I feel exactly the same. I don’t really care about seeing a showing with women only, but I can completely understand why women would want that. And it hurts NO ONE to provide it.