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Kicking Ass and Taking Names


HAHAHAHAFUCKINGHAHAHAHA Yeah, that’s not what we’re doing. But goddamn, we are talking a really good game right now. Randy and I have decided to finally take care of issues we have with this house we bought. Nearly 4 years ago. First, we replaced the water heater. After finding roof damage, we just got a new roof which was covered under our homeowner’s insurance. Next week, our...

Spank It Like It’s Ham Salad


That’s what I’m going to do to 2022. Please note, I said “to” 2022, not “in” 2022. If I had said that I was going to spank it like it’s ham salad IN 2022, then this would be a very different blog post that I would never write.  I know it makes no sense, but how the fuck long has it been since anything made sense? Monday, Randy and I will celebrate our...

Bring on 2022. I guess.


I’m not getting excited for a new year. Bring on 2022. I guess Lucy Van Pelt can only fool me so many goddamn times. I’m not Charlie Brown. I am, however, Charlie Brown’s first cousin who is easily fooled over and over. Full disclaimer: I have no cousins named Charlie Brown. But when I was a kid, there was this amusement park ride that I would ride with my dad that darted in and...


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