Are The Seven Deadly Sins Equal In Severity?

A

Or should they be rated?

Will committing just the lesser ones get you at least a little hand held fan when you go to hell?

Pride

I see pride in a number of different ways. I get how it became one of the seven deadlies. Being humble is a good thing. Practicing humility is admirable. Pride gets in the way of that.

Is pride all that bad?

Pride can work against us in a lot of ways.

I’m not going to the gym until I lose a little more weight. Fuck that. I will NOT be the slowest person on the treadmills.

If your pride is keeping you from improving yourself, then it’s time to re-examine your pride. And really, that kind of pride might not be sisters with shame, but it is at least inappropriately behaving cousins with shame. Trust me, as someone who has dealt with shame on a professional level, that kind of pride is not your friend. As Marcellus Wallace says “Fuck pride”.

What about the kind of pride where people have a burning desire for you to admire their impressive and expensive toys?

Look at it. Look at it. LOOK AT IT! TELL ME HOW WONDERFUL I AM!

I heard stories from a former boss about how he owned his first Rolls Royce by age 21. I heard about his sailboats and his RV that was worth 3 times more than my house. I got to hear about the racehorse he wanted to buy.

It’s hard to listen to that bullshit on a regular basis and not start making gagging noises.

I’m pretty sure if we could look behind that pride we would encounter a deep, black cavern that cannot be filled. Not all the cars or designer labels or diamonds made could fill that cavern. That cavern can’t be filled with things. Something else is missing.

But that sure as hell doesn’t stop people from trying. I am not excluding myself. I am guilty in indulging in retail therapy. I can’t remember a single time where that cheered me up longer than a few minutes. Also, the remorse of spending money foolishly lasted longer than the fleeting cheery moment.

But what about pride you feel about your kids or grand kids? How about the pride you feel when you finally slip into that smaller size of jeans? Or the pride you feel when you get promoted, or land a job you want? How is that bad? How can that be a sin?

Fucking hell, I so rarely feel proud of myself that I really don’t want to be told it’s a bad thing if I do. I think we all deserve some pride. We can be proud of ourselves. We can be proud of others.

Okay..that’s it. I am officially repealing pride as one of the seven deadly sins. We will need to replace it with something else. The Six Deadly Sins just doesn’t work. We need seven.

I think we should replace pride with double dipping in the chip dip. Although, that’s more than one word. I believe the seven deadly sins have to have one name. Like Madonna or Cher.

Give me some nominations.

And tell me something you are proud of.

 

 

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72 comments

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  • I say replace it with “Stupid”

    Lotta motherfuckers gonna be in hell for sure.

    And I’m proud that I finally got off my ass and started writing as my therapy a few years ago. I have met all you wonderful people as a result!

  • Disloyalty- I am loyal to the death unless you betray me and then you cease to exist. Trust is everything. What am I proud of? Hmmm, at the moment it’s the latest piece I wrote. I think it’s one of my best. So I’m either proud or I’m delusional and it’s actually rubbish.

    • You are NOT delusional! And yes on the disloyalty. I am loyal to a fault as well…I can handle a few lies…everyone lies sometimes, but to be betrayed by someone I trust..by someone whose back I’ve got…that hurts more than anything.

  • OMG…I was just chatting about pride with a friend yesterday who is struggling with the fact that she’s gained a lot of weight “even though” she “loves and accepts” her body. She also said that she practices body confidence and gratitude.

    But, she’s embarrassed because her weight gain has made basic hygiene harder. I asked her one simple question: how might you choose to be proud of your body, right now, rather than embarrassed?

    She looked like a deer in the headlights. She was afraid to feel pride. If we can’t be proud of our bodies…what the hell?

    Pride is powerful, but we’re taught (usually when someone tells us we should be ashamed of ourselves) that pride is a sin.

    In the end, I asked her to consider ways in which she is proud of her body, even if it’s a matter of being proud of having woken up this morning.

    So yeah…I am with you. Pride isn’t a sin. It’s close to reverence…and having reverence for oneself is a basic human need.

  • Condescension. That should definitely be up there in the 7 big ones. Makes me want to slap people.

    And what am I proud of? Some days, that I didn’t slap someone during the day. And that I am basically functional. Other days, I am proud of my creativity and the results of it, whether that is my writing, my cooking, my painting, whatever. Funny how you can shift between being proud of something to wanting to hide it under a rug in a moment, though.

  • Gossip should be the seventh.
    I am proud of my kids, and that I got to the pool today despite the migraine I am harbouring….
    Pride isn’t the problem, gloating is the problem.

  • I say we just get more specific and call it hubris. Not all pride is bad, just as not all trust is good. They need to be done right, or there will be consequences. I feel a certain pride in getting this comment typed in less than half an hour, considering how poor my eyesight is right now. That would only be a problem if it kept me from getting my surgery, which it most certainly won’t.
    I’ve been proud of many things in my life. I think I’ve always felt that if I wasn’t at least a little bit proud of something, I wasn’t trying hard enough. Maybe pride, like most forms of motivation, works best in small doses.

    • I cannot WAIT to get a comment from you after your surgery that tells me how much better your vision is! I really mean that. I can’t wait for that to improve for you.

  • Religion — I think organized religion is all about power and control and teaches shame, guilt, exclusion, and bigotry. I’m not talking about spirituality — I’ve got no problem with God and those that believe and worship — it’s the dogma and arbitrary rules made by man and followed so blindly by many that bother me.

    Plus, I think it would just be ironic if religion was one of the deadly sins!

    I now need to pack for my inevitable trip to hell.

    • Absolutely. I work at eradicating this from my life. I also am working on calling it out when I hear it from other people. Not in a mean way..just in a way that says ‘I don’t agree with that’. That’s some hard shit to do. At least for me.

  • In the words of the late, great Warren Zevon, “I’m very well acquainted with the seven deadly sins. I keep a busy schedule trying to fit them in.”

    I don’t much believe in “deadly” sins or heaven and hell for that matter, but I’ll play along. It seems to me that the loudest voices who preach about pride and these other supposedly damn-you-to-hell type of sins are often the most arrogant and zealous people I have laid eyes on. Perhaps ZEALOTRY should replace pride. It’s seems like the sensible choice.

  • Meanness. Be nice to one another.

    Meanness is a bit of a cheat, because its at the root of so many other shitty things people do.

    Gossipers, bullies, braggarts- they all have a mean streak. They have other issues as well, but they wouldn’t be doing those things without their mean streak.

    I’m proud that I read your blog first thing this morning without even a full cup of coffee to fuel me!

  • Materialistic assholes are the worst and if you strip away all of their toys, guess what? They’re still assholes. I tend to transfer my pride to my children and grandchildren. I’m proud of my children for raising such amazing grandchildren for me to enjoy. 🙂

  • Here’s an idea. What if we didn’t focus on sins at all but things that were way positive, like love, courage, kindness? You are so right about that big cavern of insecurity and need that can never be filled, by the way. I see it all the time in people who blow hard. Sad.

  • Everyone else took my words because I’m slothful and slept in today. The late Debbie Ford (coach and metaphysician) felt every human has a light and dark side which both deserve to be celebrated and loved. Pride can move towards either side. If we have too much pride and don’t ask for help we lose the power of human connection and we might miss a chance to make ourselves even better. (ie not going to the gym because we are embarrassed we need to go to the gym) Our pride in accomplishments can serve to teach others how to attain goals. But not that boastful, “look at my boat, I’m rocking awesome amirite?”

  • I’m going with Ignorance. When I overhear a conversation between two people who clearly have NO IDEA what they are talking about (and haven’t bothered to avail themselves of any facts), I want to punch them both in the face.

    I’m also proud that I finally stopped saying “I wish I had time for writing” and started actually writing this year.

  • Loved this! Reading you makes me want to have you over to sit on my couch (prison!) and hang and chat up a storm about everything under the sun.

    I suppose pride is sinful just like anything else- when it takes over and drains the good right out of everything. Same with all the other sins… we all do them, feel them, indulge in them within a reasonable and natural limit- but these are deadly because they can pull us in and take over.

    Pride is beautiful- when we embrace who we are and applaud our growth and gifts! But watch out because much like all the deadly sins… there’s a steep cliff just ahead you need to constantly veer away from!

  • Disrespectfulness
    The one thing I DEMAND from people is the respect that they believe they deserve. Do not treat me like shit just because of my age, the way I look (I kind of look like an asshole but I really try hard not to be one so why treat me like one?!?!), my tattoos/piercings, or anything else! I do not think respect should be earned but given until that person has done something to lose it. And even then, you should still respect that person as nothing more than a human being. There is no reason to always treat people like a piece of shit.
    I have been having a real shitty month so it’s hard to find something that I’m proud of, so I’m gonna go with my kids because who could not be proud of something that has your heart in their hands?

    • a thousand times yes to this! I am sorry you’re having a bad month. I am too..So we can be miserable together.

      We were just talking with friends this weekend about how Randy and I have been underestimated because of the way we look. I find it both amusing and annoying.

  • Cruelty. Or spite, if you wanna stay mono-syllabic.
    That burning need some folks have to be hateful to others; especially if it is sly hatefulness that has lingering effects. It is the Mean Girl turned up to 11 and I think it is possibly one of the things currently awry in the world.

    Hrm. Proud moment…
    My most recent Go Team Bon moment was someone whose writing and opinion I respect telling me that I am a good writer. After months of writer’s block and frustration, it was an ego boost/morale improver.

    • That ALWAYS feels good, doesn’t it? I live for those moments.

      And yes..that burning need to be hateful to others. I don’t get it. I’m not saying I’m never mean..but I certainly don’t LIVE for those moments.

  • Narcissism, or cruelty would be my nominations for number 7,
    I’m proud that I’ve managed to claw my way back to some sort of sanity in the last 12 months and that people in the business are starting to recognise my work. I wish that people close to me could be proud of what I’ve achieved instead of giving me that look of disappointment and pity….

    • I wish you could see my face right now because it’s FULL OF PRIDE for you!

      And yes, Narcissism…what an ugly ugly thing. I mean..when it’s out of control. A little is normal. But we know what ‘not normal’ is, don’t we?

      • Thanks and the same goes for you, I know how hard it was to take the step you did and I’m so proud of you for doing it. I know it will be a while before you start to feel even slightly comfortable there, if ever. That discomfort is just part of the fallout from the past, but it has to be better than the other place, I’m willing it to be! 🙂
        Yes we do know what ‘not normal’ is, hoping I never have to deal with it again.

        • Yeah, it’s getting better..it really is..but it’s like you get so used to the abuse that without it, everything seems skewed..which is so fucked up..but real.

  • I think bragging is pride on steroids. Nothing or no one is good on steroids.
    Back stabbing with cruel words or gossip should be #7 and actually be rewarded with stabs in the back of the perpetrator!

  • I vote for meanness and ignorance, and a huge resounding yes for zealotry (especially in light of Paris, today).

    I still vote for pride, though, because it’s behind so many other horrid things people do. Gossiping, condescension, and so many other mean things can be traced to just plain pride, one way or another. They say the love of money is the root of all evil, but I think pride is right there with it.

    Maybe there should be like, 10 sins. We could just have a revolving bottom three, depending on the day.

    I love the different slant, though– that yes, there is a different “pride”, in your children, your accomplishments, etc. To me, that qualifies as “immense personal satisfaction and contentment”, which is definitely not a sin. Unless you brag about it, of course.

    Today, what I’m proud of is my amazing family, and my personal accomplishment in continuing to master the lovely language of FRENCH, just for me.

      • It IS, and I’m definitely proud of it.

        Not that I’ll possibly ever go to France, or even meet a French person. But I dream French words sometimes, and Google Translate on my phone believes I’m French, so that’s something, n’est-ce pas?

  • My 16-year-old son would say small talk. He says it gets in the way of important thoughts in the head. I like small talk. But I don’t have many important thoughts … so there is that.

    I am proud of him and his origami. And that two of his pieces got selected for the juried art exhibit at Joint Mathematics Meeting.

    • Oh those are some good reasons to be proud. I have a 16 year old son as well…they’re fun. Funny, insightful…kind of a pain in the ass sometimes..but still.

  • Yeah I feel like this is just an area where our language fails us, because there should really be different words for those things. The second one should be self-respect or something. And I agree– we probably need MORE of that. More of feeling like “yeah, I just kicked ass and can feel good about myself.” The first one is just like watching TV for 19 hours straight and feeling like you’re living (okay, I have done this, but not on a regular basis.. usually). And that is my nomination for a deadly sin.

  • I think chastity should be a sin. NOT Chastity Bono – actual chastity since it’s really a deal-breaker if your man has NO hang-time; or likes rubbing mayonnaise all over his junk, etc.

  • I’ll go with Abuse. Abusing self, abusing others.

    But I don’t follow a Christian religion and there is no such thing as a sin for me. Everything in balance and moderation.

  • Someone else already beat me to cruelty, but let me elaborate on it: a kid who was in my Boy Scout troop found a turtle and put it in the fire “to see what would happen”. Bullshit. He was a cruel little monster. I seriously hope he got help, not only for his sake but so hopefully he wouldn’t inflict any more cruelty on anyone or anything else.

    Yeah, my “sin” is pretty specific: intentionally making any living thing’s life worse is cruelty, and I don’t think there’s anything worse. And I emphasize “intentionally” because we all do and say hurtful things without thinking. It’s the ones who do it intentionally, or who feel no remorse when it’s pointed out to them, who need to be punished.

By Michelle

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