I mentioned, in another post, I’ve been undergoing ketamine treatments. So far, I haven’t had any real revelations. My brain didn’t show me any memories. Mostly, so far, the treatment just builds and takes down weirdly shaped and colored structures. Except, one memory. I did have one. Only, it’s not like this is a forgotten memory, it’s one that I think of often. I...
I mean, I know I’m not stupid. But I don’t know why. Let me explain. At least I will try. And herein lies the fucking problem. I guess the easy answer is that I assume I am stupid because as a child, my narcissistic father told me I was stupid. A lot. Perhaps, it is that simple, but I don’t think so. I program computers and code in an old ass, not sexy language. Black screen...
I mean, it’s possible.
I have a vague plan in place. My plan is to retire in about 3 years, knowing full well we won’t be able to afford retirement.
A girl can dream.