You guys, sleep has been elusive.
I mean, I’ve had insomnia issues since my early forties, but I seem to be going through a bit more than usual.
My post menopausal hormones have fallen in with insomnia and formed a gang against me.
Pretty sure I hear mother nature and father time chuckling as I write this.
It’s snippets of songs or inane questions. I could get the answer if I got out of bed and picked up my phone from the charger.
Last night, I had Gimme Some Water by Eddie Money stuck in my head. It’s lasted through out the day. At this point, I am fairly certain that I shot a man on the Mexican border.
But that was just the soundtrack for the real reason I couldn’t sleep.
I couldn’t sleep because I couldn’t remember the name of the woman Rod Stewart was with when he recorded Tonight’s The Night.
Cool, cool water…
Only, I actually did remember. Britt Ekland. But then I would tell myself that was wrong. Not Britt Ekland, that other girl.
When I got up this morning, I googled it and it was, of course, Britt Ekland. When I first saw the answer, my initial thought was, “no…that’s not right.”
Give me some water…
I had so many plans. But not getting much sleep fucked up a lot of those plans.
I took Friday off work and this is the end of my long weekend. I got about half the housework done that I wanted to. Although, I can’t really blame being tired for dragging my feet on the house work. I am in tune with nature, I too abhor a vacuum.
If cleanliness is next to godliness, then according to my house, I am an atheist.
I need a little water…
It wasn’t a complete loss, though. I accomplished two things.
First, I got to add to my “travel around the world” money. When I clean, I keep the money I find in a dresser drawer for a trip around the world. I found a dime in the tub, so there’s that.
The other thing is I figured out how to fool my devices that spy on me.
You know how you can talk about something specific and almost immediately see ads for that exact product on your social media accounts?
Well, when I cleaned today, I just recited this over and over: Anal warts, fungal cream, stinky halitosis, scabies cure, lice combs, how to fix neurosis.
I have way fewer ads on my sidebars now.
Mostly, a bunch of messages that say “Oh god, I’m so sorry” and maybe a few mental health facility ads.
So, you know, I’m spending my time off productively.
Here’s to hoping that I sleep a little more tonight since I have to go back to work tomorrow. Or if not, maybe I’ll at least get a different musical artist. No offense to Eddie Money.
Smack that horse in the ass, with my last dying gasp
My brother could hear me say