Sorry I missed another week last week.
It didn’t feel right to post anything about anything as we mourned George Floyd. It didn’t feel right to post anything about anything as the world poured out into the streets in protest of another black man being killed by people we pay to protect and serve.
The global pandemic isn’t getting better, but we’ve gone back to business as usual. Or at least too many of us have.
I went back to working in an office last week. I don’t like it. It feels ridiculous. I spent 3 months holed up in my house for what? To be exposed as cases are rising? What did the last 3 fucking months even mean, then?
I’m not super close to other humans at my desk and people wear masks in meetings, so that is good. I just can’t get out of there fast enough in the afternoon. My hands are feeling the effects of being coated in gallons of sanitizer.
There is also a pretty bumpy transition from being isolated to not being isolated. I’m already an introvert.
After being in my house for 3 months, I have an appreciation for agoraphobics. I just want to be here. All the time.
Going back to a full time schedule was like being thrown in the deep end of the pool to learn to swim. I’m still not okay with it.
So, the world is on fire.
Racism and ugliness are presented to us on a daily basis.
It doesn’t appear that the police have slowed down on killing black men since George Floyd was crushed to death.
We’re dying from a virus and we still have to deal with the stupid president.
If it keeps on raining, the levee’s gonna break.
Which brings me to this.
In the midst of this fucking global shitshow, Randy and I discovered a Youtube channel that we cannot get enough of. Jamal AKA Jamel. His show is called Reactions and he watches music videos and, well, reacts to them.
I could try all day long and still not tell you how very much I love this man. He is genuine and you can feel his appreciation of all the music. He exudes kindness and openness.
For me, it’s like getting to hear songs that I’ve known for decades again for the first time. I watched him listen to When The Levee Breaks and actually laughed in places. I knew what was coming up and I knew I was going to get to see him light up. It made me feel so good to watch him that I’ve cried more than once. I laughed more, though.
Laughing is good.
I am grateful to have the opportunity to revisit these old classics and hear and see them through someone else’s experience. The universe has been a total dick lately, but I’m counting finding this young man as a gift from the universe.
As an added bonus, I learned something huge from watching his videos. We watched his reaction to Gimme Shelter by The Rolling Stones which included the lyrics.
I have always loved this song. Merry Clayton owns this song. Her backup vocals are amazing. But did I hear them right? No. No, I did not. All these years, I thought she was singing “Ohhh, children” not “War children”. I also thought she was singing “Heeeey baby…it’s just a shot away” not “Rape, murder, it’s just a shot away”.
Well, the words make the song a tad bit more dark, doesn’t it?
Also, it doesn’t hurt to really listen to the shit you’ve been listening to for years, because it’s possible that you haven’t been hearing it.
I’m watching as I write this. I had to stop for a while and watch Born On The Bayou by Creedence Clearwater Revival and then Me And Bobby McGee by Janis Joplin.
So, watching this channel has been a balm for both me and Randy. We have watched hours of his shows. I turned someone I work with on to him and he went down the rabbit hole as well. I was so happy to be able to share it with him.
And now I am happy to share with you. I truly hope you carve out 30 minutes or so and watch his videos.
Personally, I’d like to see him watch Know Your Rights by The Clash and Watching The Detectives by Elvis Costello.
Anyway, I am grateful for Jamal AKA Jamel and I’m glad he is on this planet. Comfort is in short supply these days.
I hope you are all finding comfort where you can.
Also, if it keeps on raining, the levee is gonna break.
#SayHisName #GeorgeFloyd #BLM #BlackLivesMatter
Photo courtesy of Yves Bernardi