Get your mind out of the gutter. I didn’t mean it that way. Perv.
Priscilla, Queen of the Cubicle and I are talking about the approaching storm and wondering if it will mean we’ll get some excitement at work this afternoon. In the meantime, we’re doing what we do best. Talking about nothing.
Me: I took a quiz on FB and it says that I’m only worth 6 goats. SIX. It didn’t even take into account that I can make really good cookies.
Me: I think I’m worth at least a dozen goats.
PQOTC: What kind of goats?
Me: It doesn’t say.
This is the part where I send her a link so she can take the quiz.
Me: Hurry up. I want to know how many goats you are worth.
PQOTC: I’m hurrying! Hold your goats.
Me: I mean, Bababababa
Me: Maybe I am only worth 6 goats, but dammit, I’m going to be the best 6 goat girl I can be.
PQOTC: Dammit. 6. Maybe that’s the max
Me: Nope. I saw a 9 goat girl on FB.
Me: Hahaha. You’re only worth 6 goats, too. It’s probably because you don’t have a uterus anymore.
PQOTC: Dammit! I could get at least 3 goats for my uterus.
Me: You’re right though, it doesn’t say what kind of goats. We could be fainting goats or screaming goats. Not normal goats who don’t have zillions of videos on youtube.
PQOTC: Maybe we’re fighting goats! Or exotic goats!
Me: Paint me like one of your French goats.
Me: I’ve watched so many goat videos that it’s embarrassing.
PQOTC: Yeah, I’ve watched more than I care to admit.
Me: I’m missing ‘new copier’ training to have this goat conversation.
PQOTC: Why in the fuck do you need copier training?
Me: I guess I’ll never know since I blew it off.
PQOTC: Too bad. That’s a notable skill for a resume. It could make the difference on getting that next job.
Me: I’d rather talk about goats.
And this, my friends, is why I don’t know how to use the new copier at work.