Malignant Narcissist Lies: Quantity over Quality

I am both amused and annoyed by people trying to analyze 45’s malignant narcissist lies.

They aren’t hard to figure out.

His lies are as outrageous and transparent as they seem.

It doesn’t matter if the lies are believable. What matters is the fabricated reality be protected. The lies wrapping up the false existence don’t have to believable or make sense. They just have to provide a protective coating.

President spork finger’s lies have grown to dramatic proportions. I don’t remember the exact number and I am way too lazy to look it up, but it’s something like, over the past month, he’s told more lies than all the humans that have ever existed have told. I might be exaggerating, but it’s not by much.

On a scale from “liar liar” to “pants on fire”, he’s just a heap of ash.

I wrote a while back about collapsed narcissists.  I don’t know how long it will take to get to the eye of the storm. What we are witnessing is a narcissist collapsing, a  dangerous and frightening collapse.

The lies are going to get even more fantastical and more desperate.

I am positive of this. I have seen it. Not often. It wasn’t often that my father would get cornered and completely trapped by his lies, but when it happened, his reaction was never to retreat. Never.

His reaction was a foaming at the mouth, incoherent melt down.

He would say whatever he had to say to force his reality to be what he needed it to be. He would  contradict himself and then swear that he didn’t. And woe to the person who pointed that shit out. Spoiler: That was usually me. It never ended well. 

Here is something I know for sure: Even though my father professed to be the strongest, biggest, baddest motherfucker who ever walked the planet, he wasn’t. He was broken. Hollow. There is no doubt that he was dangerous, but he was still only a man. And while one man is certainly capable of doing a shit ton of damage, he was still only one broken man. He didn’t get to win. He doesn’t get to win.

The president is no different.

Well, other than he’s president and that certainly poses issues for every breathing creature on the goddamn planet, but he is just a man.

Well, okay, he’s also propped up by criminals stuffing their pockets with our money as fast as they can, but still.

He doesn’t get to win.

They are just a handful of humans. With a lot a power, sure, but we are many and they do not get to win.

Pay attention to the lies. I think you might be stunned at how out of touch this will get.

I won’t, though. Other people who have watched narcissists collapse won’t be stunned. We’ve seen it before.

I am still afraid. I remain convinced that we have not seen the worst of this yet. But I am also absolutely positive that we will come out on the other side of this with more strength. Hopefully with more compassion.

It’s going to be rough.

Hold on to each other. Look for beauty. Create art. Make food. Laugh. Hold each other.

And if you’ve been on the fence about maybe adopting a rescue? Go do that. Go. Think of the cuddles, man. The cuddles help a lot.

I don’t think I’ve told you all this recently, but I love you all. I appreciate you all. I  hope you understand how much you’ve helped me over the years just by listening.

Peace.

#RESIST

 

Photo courtesy of Michael Gaida

 

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Add your comments below. Profanity is encouraged, but not required. ;)
  1. Have I told you lately how much I love you and admire your writing?

    Reply
  2. I love you back and that’s no lie.

    Reply
  3. Cathy says:

    You are the best. #resist

    Reply
  4. Lynne says:

    Politics, law enforcement and the legal profession ALL attract narcissists. While I certainly AGREE with everything you’ve said, why don’t you analyze President Obama, a lecturing narcissist who deplores the middle class because of his superior intellectual prowess?

    I think selectively bashing presidents based on political ideology is dangerous, but its indicative of our country and it’s dissolution into the abyss of identity politics.

    Your insight has helped me tremendously in my recovery from CPTSD due to childhood issues from 2 narcissistic parents. I was scapegoated and I’ve been married an alcoholic narcissist for over 30 years. So I appreciate your insight.

    However, I’m disappointed in 4he lack of balance in this blog.

    Thank you for all you do and continue to do

    Reply
    • Michelle says:

      I appreciate your kind words and I understand that you feel my blog needs balance. However, Obama never ONCE triggered my PTSD, Obama never ONCE reminded of my father. I understand you feel the way you feel about Obama, but I don’t see it the same way. 45 is a racist, a predator, a xenophobe and cares for NOTHING but himself and protecting his fragile, broken self.

      Also, and I mean this in the gentlest way possible, but this blog is MY space. This blog is how I work out life and hopefully help or entertain other people. I have zero obligation to make anything about it balanced. I don’t get paid for this shit…I just write what is in my mind. I certainly understand that it is not for everyone, but I have absolutely no inclination to “balance” anything here.

      Reply
      • Lynne says:

        Thank you for your insight and your insight. Narcissism is just now being recognized as an extremely destructive personality disorder. I wanted you to know I appreciate you and the work you do.

        For me, I started out thinking it was just my mom. OMG. then I realized –my dad … it’s so sickening and thankfully blogs like yours, and the fact my sister is right alongside me ( she married an alcoholic narcissist who bankrupted her) I’ve survived.

        I just see narcs. For who they are. Regardless. It helps me understand my trigger responses, as you mentioned in your reply.

        Thanks for your hard work. The world is a crazy place, and while we see 4hings differently, I appreciate you. Very much.

        Reply
      • Joy Kay says:

        And now I like you even more!

        Reply
  5. Friday v says:

    All the art things! Dance, cook, paint, fix engines, pound metal, knit baby blankets, crochet hats, throw glitter around, whatever floats your creation boat, all acts of love and creation are antithetical to evil!

    Reply
  6. The cuddles definitely help. I’m so glad I adopted a puppy. Also, running off to Disney World helps too.

    Reply
    • Michelle says:

      I have been REALLY thinking about a puppy. My one of my cats would lose his mind. He’s a grumpy old man at 2 years old.

      I want to go to Universal studios and go to the Harry Potter place. Randy is not excited about that at all…but he’s going.

      I miss you. xoxoxoxox

      Reply
  7. Troll says:

    Shit ton – my favorite unit of measurement.

    I’m getting better or, rather, it’s getting better for me. Nothing to do with the post, but there it is. I’m getting closer to being able to GTFO of here. I hate it here and have a shit ton of reasons. I’ll be gone with no forwarding address, lol.

    I thought you may be interested and I can post here without the wrong eyes seeing it.

    Nice article.

    Reply
  8. As I’ve said before, I haven’t dealt with this sort of person in my own life – at least not to any in-depth extent. And that’s probably why I’m so amazed at the behavior by the President. It’s the unnecessary lies that I find notable – the ones where he doesn’t even need to lie. It’s as though it’s a reflex. As though he doesn’t even consider “What is the truth here?” before answering.

    I’ve been staying away from it. I figure, hey, I know I don’t support him, and I know I’m not REALLY do anything to stop him, so keeping up with every dumb line and action is just… raising my blood pressure for no reason.

    I’m a little ashamed at not being more active, but… we all have our parts to play.

    Reply
  9. Emily says:

    Thank you for this. I have been in the depths of despair. You cheered me. I’m also aware that 45 will become more dangerous as he implodes and I’m not looking forward to that, but eventually some powers-that-be will be forced to step in & contain him…I hope I hope. Anyway, you’re right; we have to live as best we can in the now.

    Reply
  10. Mary says:

    Michelle, you have helped me just by writing. And you are absolutely right about the cat cuddles. 🙂

    Reply
  11. Dara says:

    Balance? Fuck balance! I love tipping the scale. I love you and your writing!I also believe we will prevail, but the eye in this shit storm is going to be bad, really really bad. Sending snuggles [is that too weird?] and cuddles to you, Randy and the kitties!

    Reply
  12. BarbaraM says:

    I’m so thankful to you for making me laugh during this reign of terror. I so look forward to your blogs!

    Reply
  13. Spiked Lee says:

    Your analysis of 45 makes more sense to me than anything I read on the nationally Important Newspaper sites. I’m sorry you had the childhood you did, but grateful that you can give me insight in to the state of our country. No need for balance: your site, your views. Based on your experiences. With your sense of humor, which helps.
    I wish I could have a kitty. Or a doggo. Allergies prevent both, which gives me sad face. Or more accurately, snotty-runny-sneezy face, but I wish. At support group last night we all shared our little stories “Thanksgiving!” “family meltdowns!” “not as bad as last year!” And then spent the last 15 minutes talking about kitties. We always try and talk about taking care of ourselves, not the others, and kitty cuddles are a great for self care. As are dog walks and hugs and, apparently, bearded dragons. Bearded dragons do not make me wistful, but to each their own.
    Thanks, Michelle, hugs to and from Randy and the kitties.

    Reply
    • Michelle says:

      Thank you, sweetness. I am very confident in my analysis of the orange nightmare. I have a hard time saying that I’m good at ANYTHING..but I am a goddamn expert at spotting the narcissist. They’re not different. I mean, the words and the actions vary, but ultimately, they’re all broken in the same way.

      Sorry about the allergies! What about a hairless cat? I mean, they need love too. But I think they’re super expensive, aren’t they?

      Reply
  14. Christine says:

    I volunteer for a cat rescue group and would just like to add that rescues are always in need of temporary foster homes. It goes a long way towards keeping them healthy and socialized until furever homes are found (especially if they are young kittens.) I’ve only had 1 foster fail — a gorgeous gray and white cat that took a real liking to my husband, so we kept him. 🙂 If you’re not sure about getting a dog, maybe foster one first. My dog is actually best buds with one of my cats — they play and sleep together. It’s very sweet!

    Reply
  15. Paula says:

    Nancy Pelosi was returned as speaker. So at what point will the day of reckoning begin? And then what if they don’t impeach him? Does that mean someone is in the mess too?
    Isn’t there a dog with hair instead of fur? But that might not solve the problem either. I think the Obama’s got a dog that did not have as many allergens because the girls were allergic. I have two rescues. My little sweetie gets in my lap and puts her head down on my chest so I will love on her. We all need that. The unconditional love is so healing.
    Thanksgiving, someone mentioned, I am not an overly sensitive person but my two children (40 and 44) hurt my feelings. They told me they didn’t want me to talk about the rental property. That is pretty much the focus of my life right now. So we won’t talk about it. They won’t be consulted. Is that a threat, hell no, a promise.
    Back to 45, he embarrasses me. We have to be the laughing stock of the world. I don’t watch the national news. I watch local news sometime. Dallas has had so many things happen it is pretty scary. I am one of those people that people laugh about who watches cat videos. They are safe.

    Reply
    • Michelle says:

      I think when everything shakes out, we might have to say goodbye to some people we admired. It’s ludicrous to think the only villains are on the right.

      And yes, he is a huge embarrassment. I also love cat videos. haha. I need something to balance out the other bullshit.

      (sorry your kids hurt your feelings…that sucks)

      Reply
    • SoozB says:

      There are hair dogs. Poodles are one breed. That’s why my friend had hers (sadly, she lost home earlier this year. A few months before I lost my 21-year old cat. It’s been a bad year for us both.) But most allergies are due to dander, not fur. So the hairless cat (the Sphinx) may not mean non-allergenic.

      Other dog breeds include Yorkshire terriers, Bichon Frise, miniature Schnauzers, and Shih Tzus.

      Reply
  16. Monique says:

    I love you Michelle.
    Only love and resistance can save us now.

    Reply
  17. Doug in Oakland says:

    Yeah, your writing has helped me come to grips with Fergus and his felons, and having done so, and won the election (Valadao just went down giving us seven seat pickups in California) I’m not exactly backing off, but also not so obsessively hanging on every new piece of news.
    That’s what he wants me to do, turn my life into a 24/7 all Fergus all the time attention harvest, and fuck that.
    I don’t know how one can prepare for the fit he will throw besides just knowing it is coming so as to not be surprised into making it more effective by reacting badly and spreading the chaos farther than absolutely necessary, so I will just keep on reminding folks that it is on the way, and cautioning them against giving him what he wants in response to it (which would ensure that he would repeat it often).
    And I will find and share things that counteract the toxicity, if only for 45 seconds:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhQL2wnOAG8

    Reply
  18. Shani says:

    Seriously that orange ass in the White House is a fucking cult leader. Because the things that come out of his mouth are such obvious bullshit and people eat it up. I mean he lies about EVERYTHING and to this comic book villain extreme yet those characters have more depth.
    I am not surprised by what he says or does but what surprises me is how many people either believe him or just let him slide for their own greedy selfish assholes walking the earth reasons.
    But then even that doesn’t surprise surprise me. Luckily there have been resisters since the beginning of time looking at history but the fight is constant.
    And tiring.
    We all need dogs and cats and alcohol is good…pie. Chocolate…

    Reply
  19. Loved this, Michele. You’re right. Trump says whatever he wants, no matter how big a lie. In fact, if caught in the lie, he doubles down and declares an even bigger lie. To list all this man’s psychological problems would take weeks. There’s no end to it. But you’re right, he won’t win. He can’t. There’s nothing below the surface and much like in the Wizard of Oz, he’s the man behind the curtain (and a very frightened man at that). Its his supporters that scare me most.

    Reply
  20. Sing it sister! We are in troubling times to say the least. Terrifying times for women for sure.

    Reply
  21. Linda says:

    Sending all the hugs. I was talking to K about 45 last night – I am surprised that nobody has tried to assasinate him yet. She said that as much as she hates him, she feels that the country would be in an even worse state if Pence got in – I don’t know much so I had to bow to her knowledge. She said that she felt that while 45 did ‘his thing’ he was stupid in doing it but that Pence would know exactly what he was doing and do it anyway.
    We leave in 23 sleeps to see the two of them – I am so F-U-C-K-I-N-G E-X-C-I-T-E-D – it will be the first Christmas in 5 yrs that we have had with her AND it will be a white Christmas. We are used to wearing togs and sarongs (back when I wore togs) and swimming in the pool with some meat on the weber and cold salads for lunch. I think we are in for a cultural shock !!!! LOL BUT, I can’t fucking wait.
    You may be surprised at how your cat reacts to a dog – we have two cats and two dogs – the one dog tolerates the cats but won’t play, unless it’s catches up and down the passage, the other dog, Rosie, loves those two cats to bits. They go to her for licking and stay there until their heads are competely wet. They snuggle and sleep together most nights. They certainly provide me with lots of entertainment.
    Take care – sending lots of hope from down under xox

    Reply
    • Michelle says:

      OMG I hope you have a lovely visit. I agree that Pence is dangerous. But Trump has GOT to GO. Pence will be taken care of. He was picked by Manafort and Manafort is going to die in prison. Pence is going down as well.

      I threw out the first gauntlet out about fostering a puppy and Randy said NO NO NO NO NO.

      Uh huh…we’ll see.

      Reply
  22. Kristina says:

    You all give me hope

    Reply
  23. This is what worries me—because the lies don’t; I’ve seen this show before and the fact that it’s got a bigger budget and a puffy orange lead now doesn’t change the format: as you say, the implosion is happening. We’re in it. But what comes next, in my experience, is the lashing out at whichever or any perceived person or group who “broke his toy.” From the narcissist’s perspective, everything was going great until ___ came along and started ____ing. Sure, he might stick to ranting about political parties but I’m not hopeful. Because we talk a good game about the might of a pen, but his pen can do things no other pen can. And for some of it, he need seek no approval outside his own twisted brain.

    Reply
  24. Kate says:

    Your words and insights are a balm in this feverishly mad world. I have faith in us.
    This experiment is going the way many of us predicted when we saw that flamethrower win the GOP nomination. What’s been more of a stunner is finding out the number of my fellow Americans who live with so much rage and dysfunction that they would rather have a treasonous moron in the WH than a woman or a black man.

    Reply
  25. Connie says:

    Thank you Michelle for the words of encouragement!
    I totally agree it will get worse before it gets better. I just hope someone will step in before he burns this country to the ground.
    I also think this is a huge wake up call for all of us. I don’t know what will happen when it’s all over but my eyes are now opened to how many heinous people live here and it horrifies me. Does that sound negative? Or is it just my fancy Christmas anxiety?
    Love you right back!

    Reply
  26. Maria P says:

    I am sorry that your nightmare political situation is bringing up these horrible memories and making you relive them. I know it will end but it will never be soon enough.

    Reply
  27. emelle says:

    ALL THE CUDDLES! Rescues are the BEST!
    My two were rescued too young by my neighbor, and then rescued from him by me. I’d keep adopting rescues if they were in-the-least inclined to be friendly to other animals. They are NOT, so I won’t be rescuing any others until one or both of them have crossed over the rainbow bridge.

    Reply