Saying Goodbye To The Girly Girl

She was just a ghost, anyway.

It’s not that I’m never girly. I am. I’m just not very good at being girly.

I am 51 years old and have been wearing makeup nearly every day for about 37 years now. I have applied my eye shadow the exact same way for all those years.

I saw a post on Facebook (multiple times) that said something to the effect of: Holy fuck! You aren’t still applying your eye shadow like this are you? And then it showed a picture of eye shadow applied exactly the way I apply eye shadow. I also might have paraphrased the ‘holy fuck’ part.

I’m sure a true girly girl would have many eye shadow tricks in her makeup tool kit, but I just have the one. I don’t care what the judgmental Facebook post says, I’m not changing.

My limited skills at being a girly girl was identified early in life. I remember wearing a skirt to school way back in the 7th grade at Conner Junior High. It was 1976 and my skirt was knee length and had a funky seventies striped pattern. Mrs Fortney passed me a note. I looked up at her and saw a look I knew well from my teachers. Bitter disappointment and disapproval. The note said If you are going to wear a skirt, then learn to sit like a lady. 

I can only imagine that my knees were splayed and my skirt was bunched up around my thighs and my Holly Hobby undies were on full display.

Hahaha. Just kidding. I didn’t have Holly Hobby undies.

A year later, while sitting in gym class next to Billy Long (who I had a massive crush on) The gym teacher whose name escapes me, asked me if I was a boy or a girl. This is devastating to an 8th grade girl. I had on makeup and hoop earrings. Sure, my training bra wasn’t necessary yet, but my hair was feathered! I had on girl’s earth shoes!

Still, not very girly.

As I’m writing this, I recall a boy from the 8th grade named Buddy Day. Buddy was a dick. These are the things I remember him saying to me:

Your boobs are like a pirates dream. A sunken chest. 

Hey! Hey dreamboat! Not YOU, shipwreck. 

But I digress.

I had big hair all through the eighties and I could rock the acid wash with the best of them, but it was an effort. Mostly, my hair was up in a banana clip and my clothes were the least dirty and wrinkled ones laying on my bedroom floor.

Honestly, other than the banana clip, that hasn’t changed much.

A guy I used to work with at my current job told me once that my sense of style was very interesting, it was like I didn’t have a sense of style at all.

HAHAHAH. My sense of style is this: Does it smell bad? Does it kind of match? Where are my black shoes?

Now, let’s talk about eyebrows. In their natural state, my eyebrows look like  woolly caterpillars. I don’t pluck, I just trim them. When I was young, I plucked them into perfectly round arches so I looked like I was constantly hearing something shocking. But that got cumbersome. The problem now, is that I’m getting some wild ass wiry white eyebrow hairs that look like they are planning a coup. I decided that just grabbing them and yanking them out was a good idea.

Not a good idea.

My vision isn’t what it used to be and what I did was grab a bunch of eyebrow hairs that were still brown and gave myself a bald spot in my eyebrow above my left eye. I learned very quickly that a white eyebrow hair is better than a bald spot.

I attempted to correct this by filling in the bald spot with a brown eyebrow pencil. My ruse was successful and I went off to work confident in the knowledge that I at least had the appearance of a complete set of eyebrows.

This would have worked out fine if I could keep my hands off my face.

I’m a face rubber. I get tired and rub my face. I get hot and rub my face. I get annoyed and rub my face. It’s amazing I still have skin left.

When you’ve filled in an eyebrow with brown eyebrow pencil, it is imperative that you do not rub your face.

I rubbed my face.

At one point in the day, I went into the bathroom at work and noticed two things. One, the bald spot was back and two, I had a brown streak going up my forehead. How long had I been walking around looking like I tried to eat chocolate with my eyeballs? Or for fuck’s sake, accidentally smeared shit on my forehead?

A true girly girl would never have a brown streak on her forehead.

I have tried to convince myself that underneath it all lies the heart of a girly girl. I mean underneath all of it. But the truth is, not so much.

I’m ready to let that notion go. I’m okay with not being a girly girl. This doesn’t mean that I can’t do my hair and makeup and rock some heels on occasion. Well, as long as I don’t have a lot of walking to do. Those fucking shoes are just for show. I will still apply my eyeliner a little uneven and then chase it down the sides of my eyes all day long. If y’all have any recommendations for eyeliner that doesn’t smear, please let me know. 

I’ll just leave the girly girl habits to the professionals. Now, if you need me, I’ll be curled up on my bed wearing sweatpants, one of Randy’s t-shirts and reading a book.

By reading a book, I mean watching TV.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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102 comments

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  • Michelle, you kill me!
    “looking like I tried to eat chocolate with my eyeballs? Or for fuck’s sake, accidentally smeared shit on my forehead?”
    Enjoy your book. wink.

  • I am giving up a lot of notions about myself and what I’ve noticed is that, ah, that feels good, and also, almost nobody notices. People don’t notice stuff much anyway. For the past 15 years, i have conducted an experiment. When I get new eyeglass frames, I count the number of people who notice. Now, each of these frames have all been decidedly different from each other, shape, color, everything. So far, the maximum number of people who have noticed is 2. Or maybe they just hate them and don’t want to say. Don’t know. Don’t care.

    And fuck ’em if they can’t handle a chocolate shit eyebrow. You’re a trendsetter, baby.

    • Chocolate shit eyebrows would be a good name for a band. Or maybe a serial killer.

      And yeah, fuck em. I like this..I’ve always felt that I failed a little at being a girl..but that’s kind of a stupid notion, isn’t it?

  • I like to play with makeup, but again I think it is some sort of repressed artist/creativity thing for me. I bought electric blue eyeshadow and plan to wear it tomorrow. Not for irony either; I love the color. That’s all.

    Funny how I can worry about how people will notice me being fat, plain, ugly, etc. but I don’t think twice about stuff like this.

    Do your own thing if it makes you happy! 🙂

    • I have a ton of makeup. I LOVE makeup..I’m just real consistent and I’ve never attained that ‘put together’ look that a lot of women seem to achieve. I’ve just decided that I don’t care.

  • I hate those articles that say you’re doing things wrong in an attempt to teach you a better or different way. I realize headlines have to be clickbait these days in order to get hits in this busy social media world but most of the time if I need an eyeshadow lesson I’ll just google “eyeshadow tutorial” until I find a tutorial that suits my needs. And I”m never going to remember to peel a banana from the bottom and the core of an apple is always going to taste yucky.

    What the fuck kind of gym teacher asks a student that? I would have asked them the question back.

    In middle school I was told by some boy I grew up with that my arms felt like sandpaper. It wasn’t until last week I came up with a comeback, “Yeah, I use my arms to sand wood in my father’s machine shop. When I tell him you touched my arm without permission he’ll drill press your face.”

    My eyebrows drive me crazy. The cultural pressure to keep my eyebrows looking like eyebrows is bananas. I wonder if I have a slight trichotillomania with how much I obsess plucking hairs off of my neck, chin, cheeks, and eyebrows. I put makeup on my eyebrows though not to fill them in but to change their color to match my red hair a little better. And if I do my eyebrows, I must put on eye makeup. And I am an eye rubber and it’s so uncomfortable. So as an adult I do not wear makeup unless it is a very special occasion.

    As for eyeliner that doesn’t smear I use liquid liner. Instead of smearing it flakes into your eyes, causing you to feel like you have to rub them all day. Hurray!

  • There’s nothing like glancing at the latest make up trends to wreck one’s own self image! Who are these people that can put on perfect make up and rock any shade of eye shadow in the universe?
    For some of us, only one kind of application really works, so ignore that crap! I’ve tried different ways and there is one way that looks great on me, the rest look ridiculous and only suit people of certain eye shapes with model like angular features, which I don’t have.

    About to go start getting myself ready for tonight’s gig. You can guarantee my eyeliner will be anywhere but where it should be less than half an hour after I’ve applied it.
    I can recommend Shavata eyebrow pencil though, that stuff stays on, at least for me it does and I’m an eye rubber too
    🙂

  • Ditto. I never knew how to explain my lack of girlie-ness. This comes pretty close 🙂 As a child, I fought my Mother tooth and nail when dresses were involved, and still to this day do not know how to braid or even put my long hair in a descent ponytail. I work with guys and LOATHE shopping. I see myself as a person rather than a girlie girl. Not that there is anything wrong with it, it is just not for me. I would hate spending the time and money that it would take in order to be more girlish. I figure that the husband is okay with it, he did ask me to marry him after all!

    • I fought over dresses when I was little as well. I was happier when I could play in the dirt and climb and ride my bike. I also dislike shopping. Well…that isn’t entirely true. I don’t mind shopping online, but I HATE going to real life stores. It’s been a long time since I’ve set foot in a mall.

      I like getting dressed up on occasion. Nothing makes me happier than wearing a pretty dress and getting an updo..but really, no more than once every year or two.

  • I love you. Thank god for your hilariousity cause I needed it crazy bad today! I identify with all of this. I still wear my eyeshadow the same way I have for years. Which is an exciting shade of fleshy neutral all over my entire eyelid. I didn’t realize that I had horribly over-plucked my eyebrows a few years ago until I saw pictures from a vacation. I looked like a drunk drag queen (except without the fancy eye shadow). I was a total tomboy until I discovered boys. And by then I was seriously inept at hair and makeup. My sister (older than me and Seventeen Magazine beautiful) would look at me in disgust right before walking out the door to school in the mornings and say “Aren’t you going to fix your hair today?” And I think I actually did have Holly Hobby underwear. Or maybe it was Strawberry Shortcake…

  • You are hilarious, and a fantastic story teller! I’m using Maybelline EYESTUDIO liner right now. It was suggested by a friend who was tired of seeing my liner smeared all over my face. It is not a liquid liner. It is a gel liner with a brush. It has worked for me.

    • oohhh…a gel brush! I’ve never tried a gel brush!! I am so excited!!! Glad I’m not the only one with eye liner issues.

      And thank you so much..I appreciate your kind words!

    • THANK YOU! I bet he is too! What a little asshole that kid was.

      My eyebrows have since grown back, so I am back to just trimming them. And if I am completely honest, I gave myself a bald spot more than once. But I learned my lesson. I AM NOT DOING IT AGAIN. probably.

  • Ohhhh…. I got chastised by a summer boyfriend when I was 15 for sitting on a cement park bench in a miniskirt with my knees slightly apart. I’m short (4’11”) so almost every “normal” chair, bench, swing I sit on puts me in a precarious, aka inappropriate, seated position.

    I was also a tomboy as a little kid; climbing trees and running up & down the metal slide-ladder getting quite bruised up. My dad used to get dirty looks on the subway. 😉

    I heard Benefit has a brand new, “foolproof” gel liner (They’re Real! Push-Up Liner) that is waterproof and smudge-proof and gives you perfect cat-eyes. I’m dying to try it.

    • It sounds like we could have been friends. When I was little, if there was a structure, then I was climbing and swinging from it.

      I like Benefit..I’ve used their pencil eyeliner for a long time.

  • No recommendations for applying anything but the eyebrows; use a beard comb and comb up, anything tat shoots above the natural line of the brow you clip with beard scissors. It won’t reshape the eyebrows but it will keep them from going Martin Landau on you.

  • I had what I consider to be a true girly phase for a while between 2007-2009…but it’s mostly been hard, so I get it.

    So I recently fell for a new mascara product that actually has a three-step process. You put on what looks like regular mascara and then you put on “natural fibers” which are supposed to lengthen your lashes, then you “seal” the fibers on with another coat of the first stuff. Well, the other day I had an interview to conduct at a fancy restaurant and so I decided to wear the mascara. I forgot the sealant coat. When I left I happened to look at myself in the rearview mirror in my car and I had smears of black fiber under both eyes. Not an awesome look. Oh well…

    On a side note, the eyelashes on my left eye are weird…they point inward and down and that’s why I got this particular mascara to begin with…hoping to fix them. Oh well…

    • Oh man…at least I’m mostly hidden in a cubicle and don’t have to interact with other people much.

      I don’t think I could take the three step thing..I’d get bored halfway through and end up with the fibers on my face as well.

  • Here is a secret – Girly Girls while sweet and nice (at times) and chock full of makeup and styling tips RARELY will do important things like; climb chain-link fences for nefarious purposes, see who can belch loudest, order a second round of hot fudge sundays, tell blisteringly dirty jokes or hold your hair when you puke and not shame you about it and make you feel gross and embarrassed. So if you wanna scale a fence and eat some sundays later I’ll be waiting. (No puking though – I’m a lame-ass drinker)

    • See? Now THAT is the perfect perspective. Although, I don’t really climb so much anymore. But I can hold hair while someone pukes..as long as they don’t mind my running commentary of how disgusting they are and what they owe me for the service.

  • I recently gave myself an eyebrow bald spot too, just before a friend’s wedding, where I was guaranteed to be photographed. Good times, man, good times…
    I haven’t used real eyeliner in years. My eyelids have this way of eating anything that isn’t matte powder. I don’t know how they do it. I used to wear pencil eyeliner and shimmery shadows, but I could guarantee that half an hour after I put the makeup on, it would have disappeared.
    Nowadays I have two secret weapons: an angled liner brush, and Urban Decay Eyeshadow Primer Potion. The primer ensures that anything I put on my eyes is going to stay there until I’m damn well ready to take it off, and then I just dip the liner brush in matte black shadow and line my eyes that way. It takes a touch longer than a pencil would, but it stays put so much better.

    • I have very deep set eyes so make-up of any kind smears or disappears by lunch time. A couple years ago I got basically the same idea as Spoken Like a True Nut, only I don’t apply a primer potion. I just use my favorite pencil liner like usual and then use a small angled brush to go over it with any dark eyeshadow. VOILA! no more eye make-up smears!

      Hint: When going somewhere fancy that requires possible late-night antics, I also use a small, soft, rounded brush to apply pressed powder around my eyes. This seems to make my eye make-up bulletproof! Sometimes I wake up the next day still looking good!

      • If I try to put powder around my eyes I always get it IN my eyes and it feels like sand. I’m just going to say the runny smeary eyeliner gives me a sexy pouty look…not a crazy homeless look.

  • Thank GOODNESS for you, Michelle, and for this very most wonderful piece of BRILLIANCE. I think I might end up just like this when I grow up (*if* I do) and although I do pluck my eyebrows (or I would just have ONE fuzzy caterpillar), I am CRAP at being girly, and when I try, I feel like I fail spectacularly. And I have great hair which does NOTHING like what I want it to do, and it doesn’t help anyway, and I just bung it all back in an elastic and leave it on the back of my head. The red bit is positively THEE most girly I think I’ve ever done to it.

    *phew*

    This makes me feel SO much better cos I KNOW I suck at girly 😀 I don’t even have nice undies. I don’t think I even did when I was little! Plain, boring, dull, functional…*sigh* cos why bother? I used to get told off for tucking my skirt into them so I could do handstands against the school walls without showing my tummy off or disappearing under my own dress.

    • Hahahha…yeah..I don’t have fancy panties either. Granny panties all the way. I used to buy fancy ones but they cost so much and for what? phffft..pointless.

      I love the red in your hair!

  • You are hands down my kind of girly girl. Girly Girl was of course the tongue in cheek nickname my ex-hubbie gave me. For many a reason as you explain above. A little term of endearment just for me I thought- till I saw him post on Facebook (after the divorce) “Moving to be near my girly girl.” Come on there can only be one. And this week it is all you sistah!

  • This is a great list of how incredibly fake the entire “girly girl” construct is. If it’s that much work to express a very basic thing — being feminine — there is something very wrong with the accepted expressions. Someone who’s girly should still be girly without all the makeup, clothes, and shoes.

    • Yes!! Not that there is anything wrong with those things..If that is what you want, then great! I’m just tired of trying to force myself into that role when I don’t feel it and I’m really tired of making comparisons…it just gains me nothing. Except disappointment.

  • I gave myself an eyebrow bald spot when I was a teenager by bending over and slamming my face into the handle of the sliding door. I never remember to fill that shit in, but I almost never walk out of the house without my liquid eyeliner and something (preferably with color) on my lips. Go figure. I have been looking at my Martin Landau eyebrows lately and thinking it’s about time to go pay someone to give them some shape. I do that every once in a decade or so.

    • Oh man..at least mine grew back.

      I’ve had my brows professionally shaped ONE time in my life. It’s not even expensive..or at least it wasn’t. I don’t know why I don’t just do that.

  • Haha. I relate to so much of this. What is with the crazy eyebrows? I have one or two tendrils that get really long and I do end up just yanking them out. In high school I went through an unfortunate phase of makeup experimentation where I wore silver eye shadow and teal eye liner. It was the 80s. Since then I’ve been counseled to keep it simple. Smearing happens.

  • Buddy was a dick. I had a snort laugh at that inbetween classes. Only a few people looked at me strangely. I too have the mysterious white hairs that seem to come out of nowhere. They drive my daughter crazy, so sometimes I leave them there just to see how much she pays attention to it. The answer? She pays a lot of attention to strange hairs coming out of my brow. I am a yanker, but have never gone so off of the mark to actually leave a bald spot. If I do miss i just keep going until I have it. Then I save them in tiny zip lock bags and tape them to my daughters door, like a cat leaving a mouse on the porch. (not really, but I should)

  • Eat chocolate with your eyeballs! I’m dyin over here. I’m also a face rubber, and as we know, I have obese eyelids. I discovered that yesterday while trying to put on makeup for the first time in a million years.

  • hahaha. You fell into various circles of hell obviously. I will go into the locker room after teaching fitness classes to hundreds of students, only to discover my mascara has moved down my face in a sort of jail bars pattern. Why did none of the students tell me? So I now focus on personality.

  • Hilarious, Michelle! I was quite the tomboy until 6th grade hit, but I’m still no all out girlie girl, nor do I want to be. And it gets so old having to do makeup and hair every freaking day. Some weekends I just don’t (but then I won’t go out anywhere since I feel like I look hideous). Oh and AVON waterproof glimmersticks are awesome. I don’t know how rub proof they are but my liner stays intact pretty much the whole day.

  • We could be sisters – you and me !!!!! That sounds so much like me it’s scary !!!
    Have the best time curled up in bed watching TV in your trakkie daks and Randy’s T-shirt !!
    Me xox

  • I’m not a girly girl, and I’m also a face rubber. I shall learn from those that have come before me and NOT accidentally smudge my eyebrow across my face.
    Unfortunately it doesn’t help Past Me avoid the Blue Mascara Incident: I have really long eyelashes, so I don’t usually wear mascara because it makes my eyelashes touch my glasses, but when I was given groovy blue mascara, I figured I’d try it. It was only when I got home I saw I’d blinked little blue freckles onto my cheeks!

  • In the immortal words of the dearly departed Frank Zappa:

    Beauty knows no pain
    So what you cryin’ about
    Girl
    Beauty is a bikini wax ‘n waitin’ for yer nails to dry
    Beauty is colored pencil, scribbled all around yer eye
    Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die

    Beauty is a
    Beauty is a
    Beauty is a
    Lie

    I only had one girlfriend who tried to be a girly-girl very much (until a couple of years later when she decided that she was gay and dropped the whole routine). I was always torn between being appreciative of and appalled by the amount of time and effort she put into her appearance. In retrospect, I guess my reaction was typical in that I liked the way she looked with or without her makeup.

    • That sounds like Randy…He doesn’t care either way..and honestly, the effort I put into it pales to some people. I have known women who take two hours to get ready in the morning. TWO HOURS for hair and makeup. I can get ready in 30 minutes including shower.

      • Wow, 30 minutes is impressive. Especially for a woman. I don’t want to sound sexist, or like I’m complaining, but there were a number of opening acts I would have liked to have seen (or at least have seen more of their sets) but didn’t because a certain someone (who’ll remain nameless here as she is still a very good shot) took an extra hour getting ready… Let’s see, Soul Asylum, The Alan Parsons Project, and Utopia come to mind.

  • My face has been there, done that. I had to stop painting on my liquid eyeliner, which lasted longer than pencil, but w oily skin it still smears after awhile. My eyes water and after a couple hours my mascara is smeared off. Waterproof lasts a little longer but that jazz is scary and I’m too lazy to wash it off properly. I wanted to get eyeliner tattooed on but a friend did and it faded really quickly. That would be my luck. I just give up. If I’m ever single again I’ll have to work on a personality or something equally as exhaustive.

  • I started to read this and thought yep I knew I was switched at birth my twin sister really is out there. I grew up with 4 brothers so yes I only know one way to put on my eye shadow and it’s probably wrong but since I only remember to wear makeup about 15 times a year. But then I stopped dead in my tracks…you said Conner Junior High. You can’t possibly mean Conner Junior High in Hebron, KY? This is where I lived and went to school my whole life!!!! I’m dying to know.

      • Are you serious! I was born and raised in Boone County then lived in Grant County for 20 years before moving to SC 3 years ago. Do you still live there?

        • Nope..I live just North of Cincinnati now..but my family is all in Northern KY. I only lived in Grant county from age 15 until I moved out at 20. I hated it there. Hated it. I went back for my 30th high school reunion and it was nice. They had it at the country grill restaurant..I worked there when it was Gold Star Chili.

  • <3 I love this, Michelle. I'm right there with ya. I always had short hair and was often mistaken for a boy. I was bummed when my mom started to insist I wear skirts. I was quite happy with my brother's hand me downs, thank you very much. Make up? Hm, well I'm wearing less and less as I get older. I guess I'm lazy.

    • I still wear it because I have such an uneven complexion and I’m self conscious about that and my eyes get lost with no makeup and I look like the grandma I didn’t like…I had short hair most of my life, except for the 80s and now. I dig my kind of long hair…I did stop dying it a year ago and am letting the gray take over. I don’t mind that either, it’s kind of interesting.

  • Really love this post! I once had a similar situation with marinara sauce from a meatball sub (I don’t know how it ended up on my forehead – I musta been really excited about my sub that day) and no-one in the office told me! It was an hour after lunch that I noticed… Bastards.

    Also I think I just realised I am not a girly girl by reading the first part and going, “WTF… How many ways ARE THERE to apply eyeshadow?!?”

  • Really funny post! I once had a similar situation with marinara sauce from a meatball sub (I don’t know how it ended up on my forehead – I musta been really excited about my sub that day) and no-one in the office told me! It was an hour after lunch that I noticed… Bastards.

    Also I think I just realised I am not a girly girl by reading the first part and going, “WTF… How many ways ARE THERE to apply eyeshadow?!?”

    • Yep…I have 2 sons (27 and 16) and have done my best to raise them as ‘anti-buddies’..and did pretty good. They’re both compassionate and respectful. Mostly.

  • Well, it’s official, we are kindred spirits. I can’t wear lipstick without getting it on my teeth, mascara without is melting down my face, or eyeliner without it getting in my eyes. I envy the girly-girls. I really do, but I am way too lazy to care enough to change.

  • I’m a bit of a girly girl. I can do makeup and don’t mind doing makeovers (or unders, whatever is required) on occasion. However, I rarely wear makeup or do much with my hair anymore, beyond pulling it into a pony tail. I’m a mom with two little ones (3 and 22 months)….you know, survival mode! Anyhow, be who you are, not what others expect you to be. 🙂 Loved this post!

  • Oh girl, I lovelovelove this–Banana clips and 80s eyeshadow tricks and all. I have been doing my makeup the same since like 1984, and I say, if it worked for Brooke Shields (and her eyebrows), then it’s FINE.

    I’ve been sorting through some things this summer, and one of them is my wardrobe. I seem to have crossed an ‘age’ line where some of my clothes and shoes (and use the term, ‘some’ loosely), are starting to seem, um…not ‘age appropriate’.

    So now I have two voices in my head: The one who says, “Oh.my.gosh. You look like you’re trying to be 20. Which you AREN’T.” Then there’s that other (also older) side of me, who snaps back, WHO CARES WHAT THEY THINK. If I like it, I’m wearing it!

    Hence, I end up walking around in yoga pants, a big Tshirt, and sparkly Keds. No wonder I’m feeling odd.

    • I dunno…that sounds like the perfect outfit to me!

      I’m sick and in bed and wearing a ‘I heart hating things’ shirt and granny panties. I am such a bad ass here…

    • Gah….I mean…thank you. OMG that is so hard for me to hear….errr read…

      SHUT UP!! hahaha…

      I would love some make up tips. We could do a post…make up for old ladies! It will be a hit!

  • Covergirl makes some eyeliner that’s waterproof. It is also soap-and-water proof. And rub-proof. And scrub-proof. It stays on beautifully. And stays. And stays. That’s it’s only issue. You’ll either go to your grave with it still on or buy their specially formulated eyeliner remover that should never, ever be near an open flame, and probably shouldn’t be carried on an airplane.
    But you won’t smear it on your forehead.

  • Awwwwww — girl earth shoes? Those were the most comfortable, hideous looking shoes ever!

    I’ve always wanted to wear eyeliner that makes my eyes look like Cleopatra — but I end up looking more like a cross between Bozo and a raccoon. It’s super attractive.

  • This is so great. The last time I wore heels was in 1983. (I think I still have a charley-horse in my calf from that day).
    Now it is flip-flops and runners all the way baby. And birkenstocks.

    And I think my mascara is about a gazillion years old.

    Just sayin!

  • I’m with you. I went from curling every single hair on my head and taking 90 minutes to get ready in the morning (in HS), to taking 16 minutes if I don’t shave anything. I put mascara on only at stoplights. If I have a quick commute into town, I end up wearing no make up at all.

    Unless Chapstick is make up. I rock the Chapstick.

  • This post is so refreshing and to a certain degree powerful. I’m twenty six years old but I’m very much like you…I was never girly and still aren’t and I get crap for it every single day. I mean don’t get me wrong, I look every bit a woman but i’d much rather be makeup less and in…like yourself, sweatpants. Still holding out for the guy who won’t run away from that…

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