Randy and I went to the grocery this morning. We didn’t need much, just beer, potatoes and two picture frames. I had to frame my picture of me and Daryl Dixon. I also got a picture of Ryan Hurst (the guy who played Opie on Sons Of Anarchy). My sister in law loves Opie and I asked Ryan to speak with her on the phone and that call made her day. Hearing my sister in law get all squealy over Opie was every bit as much fun as having Norman Reedus wrap his arm around me.
That was a lie. Having Norman Reedus wrap his arm around me was better than making my sister in law happy, but it wasn’t way better.
Having Norman Reedus wrap his arm around me might have been way better.
But, I digress.
We left the grocery and I kept hearing this noise like a car whimpering in pain. The first thing I did was convince myself that someone else’s car was making the vaguely disturbing noise. The second thing I did was realize the sound was definitely coming from our car.
So, I did the only thing that a responsible grown up should do in that situation. I rolled up the window and started thinking about the weird sound coming out of the ice maker of our fridge.
The ice maker is making a sound that has a definite rhythm to it. It sounds like ‘Ke KE KE Ke ke ke Ke KE KE KE Ke ke ke.’ If Sam and Dean heard it, they’d be consulting books and loading shotguns up with rock salt.
The more I listen to this sound, the more I am convinced that the fridge is reciting an incantation. I am pretty sure my refrigerator is trying to raise the dead. Don’t take my word for it. I recorded it. If you play this, though, and your major appliances start acting up, I am in no way responsible.
I know why the fridge is making noise. There is an ice maker in the freezer that has never worked, or if it does, we’ve never used it. Our freezer is crammed full. Our way of shopping is to buy things and freeze them and then buy unfrozen stuff to cook through out the week because we never remember to thaw what is in the freezer. We also don’t mark what we freeze, so our freezer is crammed full with foil wrapped mystery meat.
Anyway, the fridge is so jammed, that there is a box of PF Chang’s egg rolls resting against the little bar that triggers the ice maker to start up. The ice maker doesn’t actually produce ice. It just whispers the zombie apocalypse spell.
We’re all going to die because of a box of frozen PF Chang egg rolls.
Oh, in case you missed it…I’m in a book! Here’s the post!