Standing Up At Erma Bombeck 2016


So, not a long post here. I just wanted to share my stand up video from the 2016 Erma Bombeck Writer’s Conference.

Three things:

I did not realize that the camera adds 50 pounds.

I do not know why I am doing that weird thing with my hands. What the fuck? I must have been channeling Joe Cocker.

Wendy Liebman is hilarious. If you are not familiar with her comedy, you should be.

OH YEAH.. Rena and Terri Lee, your CDs were mailed today. 🙂

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  • Our world needs warped people! And you did fine (except for the waving arms part – maybe, at your next milestone birthday, you will wake up one morning and discover you can fly? Yes, that’s it.) Lots finer than I would have. Deer in the headlights look ain’t funny.

    • Hahahah…that would be cool. I would love to fly. And if I had only remembered to pick up the microphone, I would have kept my weird arm waving under control.

  • That was good. My biggest faux pas as a step-parent was on the day before my divorce. I told my stepdaughters that we were getting divorced because of them. (A lot of truth there.) But after seeing the long faces I had to come up with the long story blah, blah, blah. I remeinded them that a step-parent has zero, zip, nada claim to them and any visiting or phone calls would have to be initiated by them.

    Nothing. I still have an Alanis Morrisette CD wrapped for Christmas that first year when everyone forgot about Ron.

    I know, cry me a river, right. So far, wife D is sticking with me. Fifteen years this year. But enough.

    You did something I could never do, get on stage and speak coherently and humorously.


  • What’s wrong with waving your arms while you talk?
    Am I doing it wrong?
    *arms waving wildly*
    It looks better when I’m actually talking…

    I don’t know about the camera adding 50 pounds… you look damn good to me 🙂 I think you’re just trying to find something to balance out the ‘huge’ in your mind arm waving shame… Your facial expressions and emphasis on the “I’m gonna buy you a pony” part were perfect! I was cringing and laughing with everybody in the audience!
    I love your work! I love how Wendy Liebman hugged you 🙂

    And, word of advice? Don’t grab the mike. It’s better to have wildly waving arms than a double death grip on a mike that makes it look like your giving a good head job when you have it close to your face…
    Anyway, that’s been my experience…

    *standing ovation*
    *wolf whistles*

    • But, Lisa! Think of the rabid male following she’d have if it appeared she was giving a good head job while on stage! She’d end up with her own poster like Farrah Fawcett and her nipples, circa 1976/77. HAHAHA!!!

      • Yeah, there’s always a time and a place for microphone fellatio…

        I’m pretty sure the Psychotic Douche Twizzles could work that move in…

        I thought comedy was already ingrained in our act??
        Implied, even….
        *notes discrepancy in script*
        *sounds out*
        ff uuh lay shee oh
        Yeah… we can make it rhyme! Get your tambourine…

  • I wouldn’t have noticed the hands thing had you not said anything. Seemed natural and expressive.

    This was as great and funny as I thought when I read the text a few weeks back. I am glad I finally get to see it.

  • Well done, M! You looked composed and your voice is lovely. The flapping arms? Made me think you had a little shoulder tension going, or maybe an itch on your back and you were trying your best not to grab that mike stand and jam it down the back of your shirt. Or you were channeling your inner penguin. Who cares? You did that. You stood up there and did that. And you invited us to watch. Yup. Those aren’t camera pounds, they’s balls!

  • Standing ovation, Michelle. I laughed so loud, my husband asked me what I was cackling about this morning. You are a natural. Timing, expressions, everything. Thanks for sharing.

    And, btw, I thought the arm waving was charming. I notice many stand up comedians have similar quirks. Instead of being a disadvantage, it becomes part of their comedic persona.

  • I didn’t even notice your hands, because your face was radiant, and your eyes sparkling with love for your boy.

    You go girl! Stnad up comedy circuit, here you come!

  • I don’t know if it’s because I saw your video from LTYM, but when I read the text of your stand up, I heard it in your voice, and thought that I knew what the performance had sounded like. I was wrong. You looked and sounded better than I had imagined it. Perhaps you are getting better at stand up? Either way, it was great, and thank you for sharing it.

  • I’m a little late to the party this morning, so sorry for that. Sometimes, you actually have to DO that laundry, because it turns out what my mom always said is true. No matter how long you let it sit there, it won’t do itself. Anywho—I first must say thank you so very much, Michelle, for the CD that I’m awaiting with much excitement. It will be so nice to have something positive and life affirming show up in my mail for a change! Music just does that to me! 😀 Now, I have to tell you to quit being so damned hard on yourself, Michelle! You are so fucking ADORABLE and FUNNY as hell!!! Just when I think your stories cannot get any better I see and hear you deliver one in the flesh and you are a riot! You didn’t “flail your arms” like Joe Cocker, you used them appropriately for emphasis. I love your delivery; you’re like a more twisted version of Rita Rudner. You have the same sweet, feminine qualities but you also have that rock chick vibe going on that she lacks. Haha!!! Lisa K., maybe we can work comedy into the Psychotic Douche Twizzles concerts? Will that work? 😀

      • Definitely Rita Rudner-esque!! I let my third son and husband watch it. Their faces when Michelle told the part about the ugly baby comment were priceless!! They both saw similarities between Michelle and my ‘parenting highlights!’ 🙂
        (I had to remind Dylan that he was still my favorite. But I had to whisper, Darin was just waking up… 🙂 )

  • That was wonderful! I said many things to my daughters that I wish I could have taken back, but don’t remember trying to be funny, just got pushed over that edge! I love your humor, and your performance was great. Thanks for sharing this.

  • Three things:

    You looked great.

    It takes most standup comedians at least ten years to feel comfortable on stage. Nine and a half months of that time is spent figuring out what to do with their hands.

    Getting to see this earlier is why I am so glad I went through all the hassle of signing up for Twitter.

  • Believe it or not I only just now found time to watch this. Life just gets in the way sometimes. But wanted to let you know I loved it. My primary thought throughout: You are SO brave!

By Michelle


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