Then it came.
Today, I am in Dayton, OH attending the Erma Bombeck Writer’s Workshop. I hope as you read this I am laughing my ass off at the talented and hilarious people around me.
Today is also my baby boy’s birthday.
Joey is 18 years old.
I probably won’t see much of him as I chose to attend a 3 day workshop over his birthday.
Totally rocking the whole “mom” thing.
I’ve written about Joey a number of times. He got pissed at me once for writing about the time he ate chocolate he found by a dumpster. In my defense, he ate chocolate he found by a dumpster.
Randy and I certainly can’t complain. Joey is a joy. He is the bond between Randy and me and Joey’s sisters and his brother. The lines between blood family and step family were fading by the time Joey joined our family. When he got here, the lines blurred until they no longer made sense.
Joey was all about the music since before he had hair or teeth.
When he was five months old, he would do this full body freak out thing whenever he heard the cover of She Said by The Cramps. I count the memory of him dancing in his car seat to a psychobilly song as a top five memory of all my memories.
He worked his way through Johnny Cash and Elvis Costello. He listened to Nirvana and Red Hot Chili Peppers. He’s in love with Bob Dylan and Pink Floyd.
He writes and raps his own lyrics. His command of the language and amazing turns of phrases make my head spin. I know I’m the mom and this is what moms say (unless you’re a really shitty mom) but that aside, he’s really fucking good. I’m proud of him and am excited for him as he finds his way in the world. I am also panicky and sad about this, but this is how life works. Our children grow up and they find their way.
It occurs to me, that I no longer have any “children” children. I only have adult children. I have had at least one “child” child living with me for nearly 29 years now.
I only have adult children.
Let me let that sink in for a minute. Because I honestly cannot possibly describe all the different ways this makes me feel.
Yesterday, only 75% of my children were adults. Today, 0% of my children are children.
All of my children can vote. I am counting on 100% of my children to be a part of this election.
If I wanted to send one of my children to the gas station to buy scratch off lottery tickets for me, any one of them could perform that task. Although, it would be weird if I asked 3 of our children who live in different states to buy me lottery tickets. I probably won’t ask Joey to buy them. I don’t buy lottery tickets. The point is, all my kids can legally buy lottery tickets now.
All of my children can be tried as an adult. Heed this, baby boy, as you enter this stage of life when you learn that the freedoms you gain as an adult aren’t always what they are cracked up to be.
So, Joey, if you are reading this, then I will tell you again. Happy birthday. I love you like mad. Also, get your dirty dishes out of the family room.